From the legendary times of the Victorian Age to the rugged reaches of outer space, the romance novels have done nothing to spark Patricia’s want and hope of finding that one special man to call her own. She’s knee-deep into her thirties, near depression, and drowning her sorrows in pints of premium ice cream. When she falls for a waiter named Matt in her favorite restaurant, her insecurities do their best to thwart her plans of true love. It isn’t until she picks up one last romance novel that she realizes life cannot be lived within the ink splattered pages of an author’s fantasies. She has one chance to set her life straight and snatch the one man who gets her—mind and body. Will Patricia take it?
Be Warned: sex toys, multiple partners, spanking, light bondage, public exhibition
Excerpt:
The Black Room was the little place Julie and I tried out after her divorce. A little kinky and a lot of fun, it catered to people preferring to remain anonymous but wanting to have an out of this world experience sexually. While I’m not the kind of girl that wanted to be tied up all the time, it had its appeal. Thus, the handcuffs in my bedroom. I hadn’t come across a man that I could trust enough to pull those bad boys out lately.
Just the type of place to get all my sexual frustrations out.
I passed through the usual check points better than I thought I would. The high class of Black Room always appealed to me. Per the code, I had chosen a satin red mask with sequined outline and draping jewel strands. The color denoted I’d go for some light bondage. I didn’t mind the occasional tied up and spanked session but the more extreme side? Not on your life.
Eyeliner coated my lids and cherry red lipstick adorned my puckered mouth. Make-up outside the club might be something I shirked with aplomb, but it was a must to gain entry. Why should I care? Tonight I would get pampered with the simple tap on the shoulder. If I didn’t get picked by a man at the end of an hour, I could choose my partner.
Within the confines of Black Room, my name was York. When I signed up, I gave the call name as a twist on my name. I thought myself clever using a candy bar as a nom de plume.
I lounged on a Victorian chair, my fuck me pumps a nice shiny red. My black dress conformed to my curves, and I felt damn sexy. Any inhibitions I had stayed in the car with the windows cracked until I finished my man meat shopping spree.
Other members chatted away as my gaze swept the room. I preferred to look disinterested, like a hard mark, than exude desperation. Whether it was the truth or not didn’t mean I wanted my hungry eyes to stray onto less than savory company. Black Room was high class, but it had its fair share of drooling troglodytes.
The room slowed to a crawl as I noticed my favorite plaything across the room. The black satin mask couldn’t hide his appearance. His mannerisms within Black Room were too familiar to me. My taut muscled specimen prowled the carpet like the carnivore I knew he could be. The apex of my thighs moistened at his presence. I remembered each wicked little escapade I had with this particular member. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he window shopped until he came across my rack. With one glance in my direction, I hooked in my bait. Already my heart slammed into my rib cage in anticipation of his electric touch.
His code name was Tall One, and he certainly fit the bill. He leaned in, and I inhaled that masculine scent uniquely his. Whatever cologne he used danced nicely with his pheromones. I was a cat in heat ready to scratch my name into his back as he rode me.
“My, York.” His words tickled my ear. “In for some adventure tonight?”
“Can you handle it?” I breathed back.
“Why don’t we find out?”
I placed my hand in his, and he led me away from the crowded room into a private one of his choosing. The lights dim, he glided me in and closed the door behind us.
Deep mahogany wood on the bedposts and luxurious red velvet hung from the peaks. A perfect centerpiece for our carnal night of pleasure. My body curled against his chest, the ache to caress his erection pulsing to my core. His fingertips glided along my shoulders. With each caress, his senses reacquainted themselves with every inch of my flesh. I groaned as his palms rubbed my nipples. They hardened instantly.
“My. Someone’s been neglecting themselves.” He tweaked my tightened areolas, and I gasped. Masturbation was second hand for me. Nothing compared to sharing a sexual experience with a partner. Especially one as interested in pleasing you as you were them. I always had that with Tall One. He’d chase all my sorrows away with one gentle stroke along my clit.
My arms reached behind to run through his hair as he lavished my breasts with attention. I ground my behind into his hardened shaft. His breathy rumble sent shivers down my spine. With one yank, he pulled the top of my dress down to expose my lacy red bra. His petting frantic, the fabric of my undergarments heightened my arousal.
“I can’t hold it, York.” His hips worked into my backside, his desire apparent in the thickened length straining against his clothing.
“I was hoping for a little play tonight.” My words were truth no matter how much my body ached to be rammed into by his cock.
“Trust me.”
The timbre in his voice echoed.
“Always.”
His hands grasped the bottom of my dress and yanked it up past my hips. He groaned when he realized I had gone panty-free for the evening. His palm cracked against my backside, and I yelped.
“You little tease.” Another swat landed on my bare ass. “You’re a bad girl, York.” His hand smoothed over my cheek, cooling the hotness swelling from it before he gave me another punishing whack.
“Hands on the bedpost, young lady.”
Wetness pooled down my thighs as I grasped the mahogany and velvet. The golden cord hanging down soon bound my wrists. His searing lips claimed the nape of my neck as his fingers pulled and teased my nipples. One hand ventured down to my wet core, stoking the flame already ignited. I shattered to his demanding touch.
than I did. OMG the sex in this book. There were a few mistakes in this book like others have pointed out. I think with a better editor that this writer could be so much more!
5/5
The Long and Short of It Reviews
Written by LASR on 3rd Apr 2013
The Romance Novel Book Club is a gem. Absolutely hilarious, I laughed from page one to the end. Kastil Eavenshade is a romance author but she manages to poke fun at everything that has to do with the genre and does it well. As the book says at one point: “The truth about the romance novels was I did love them. They mocked me in my misery, but I still cheered for that happily ever after.”
The author also laughs about life and how confusing and difficult we can make it for ourselves at times.
Her lead character, Patricia, is great. She eats all she wants, drinks too much and laughs at herself, sometimes even through her tears. She is so human that along with her good moments, her pain, frustration and confusion are palpable. I felt miserable at times watching her crumble and sabotage her own happiness.
The biggest fault I found with The Romance Novel Book Club was a mistake in the hero’s height. At the beginning of the book, Patricia says: “I hovered about two inches taller than him without heels”. However, as I read on I found that she was always shorter or at least at the same height as Matt. For instance at one point it reads: “I nuzzled against his shoulder, tempted to kick off my shoes to be at his breast.” She was wearing heels at that moment.
Another thing I found confusing was her history with The Black Room and her access to it. I had the impression she went one time without a membership card and another time she had trouble finding it when she’d just been there less than a week before.
Regardless of these mistakes, Kastil Eavenshade’s novel was a great read. The sex scenes were sizzling hot at all times with well done descriptions that made me gasp and pant. Furthermore, throughout the story I had the sensation that I was reading a contemporary novel in which real people, and not just made up characters, had the lead role.
The Romance Novel Book Club was a great book that I know I will be reading again.
5/5
Loved this story!
Written by D on 6th Dec 2012
What a fantastic read! I was drawn in immediately and could not stop reading until the story was complete!
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She’s knee-deep into her thirties, near depression, and drowning her sorrows in pints of premium ice cream. When she falls for a waiter named Matt in her favorite restaurant, her insecurities do their best to thwart her plans of true love. It isn’t until she picks up one last romance novel that she realizes life cannot be lived within the ink splattered pages of an author’s fantasies. She has one chance to set her life straight and snatch the one man who gets her—mind and body. Will Patricia take it?\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fstrong\u003e\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #ff0000;\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium; font-family: times new roman,times;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBe Warned: sex toys, multiple partners, spanking, light bondage, public exhibition\u003cbr \u002f\u003e\u003c\u002fstrong\u003e\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fem\u003e\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium; font-family: times new roman,times;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eExcerpt:\u003c\u002fstrong\u003e\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cdiv\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt; color: black;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eThe Black Room was the little place Julie and I tried out after her divorce. A little kinky and a lot of fun, it catered to people preferring to remain anonymous but wanting to have an out of this world experience sexually. While I’m not the kind of girl that wanted to be tied up all the time, it had its appeal. Thus, the handcuffs in my bedroom. I hadn’t come across a man that I could trust enough to pull those bad boys out lately.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt; color: black;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eJust the type of place to get all my sexual frustrations out.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eI passed through the usual check points better than I thought I would. The high class of Black Room always appealed to me. Per the code, I had chosen a satin red mask with sequined outline and draping jewel strands. The color denoted I’d go for some light bondage. I didn’t mind the occasional tied up and spanked session but the more extreme side? Not on your life.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eEyeliner coated my lids and cherry red lipstick adorned my puckered mouth. Make-up outside the club might be something I shirked with aplomb, but it was a must to gain entry. Why should I care? Tonight I would get pampered with the simple tap on the shoulder. If I didn’t get picked by a man at the end of an hour, I could choose my partner.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eWithin the confines of Black Room, my name was York.\u003cspan style=\"color: black;\"\u003e When I signed up, I gave the call name as a twist on my name. I thought myself clever using a candy bar as a nom de plume.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eI lounged on a Victorian chair, my fuck me pumps a nice shiny red. My black dress conformed to my curves, and I felt damn sexy. Any inhibitions I had stayed in the car with the windows cracked until I finished my man meat shopping spree.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eOther members chatted away as my gaze swept the room. I preferred to look disinterested, like a hard mark, than exude desperation. Whether it was the truth or not didn’t mean I wanted my hungry eyes to stray onto less than savory company. Black Room was high class, but it had its fair share of drooling troglodytes.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eThe room slowed to a crawl as I noticed my favorite plaything across the room. The black satin mask couldn’t hide his appearance. His mannerisms within Black Room were too familiar to me. My taut muscled specimen prowled the carpet like the carnivore I knew he could be. The apex of my thighs moistened at his presence. I remembered each wicked little escapade I had with this particular member. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he window shopped until he came across my rack. With one glance in my direction, I hooked in my bait. Already my heart slammed into my rib cage in anticipation of his electric touch.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eHis code name was Tall One, and he certainly fit the bill. He leaned in, and I inhaled that masculine scent uniquely his. Whatever cologne he used danced nicely with his pheromones. I was a cat in heat ready to scratch my name into his back as he rode me.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“My, York.” His words tickled my ear. “In for some adventure tonight?”\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“Can you handle it?” I breathed back.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“Why don’t we find out?”\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eI placed my hand in his, and he led me away from the crowded room into a private one of his choosing. The lights dim, he glided me in and closed the door behind us.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eDeep mahogany wood on the bedposts and luxurious red velvet hung from the peaks. A perfect centerpiece for our carnal night of pleasure. My body curled against his chest, the ache to caress his erection pulsing to my core. His fingertips glided along my shoulders. With each caress, his senses reacquainted themselves with every inch of my flesh. I groaned as his palms rubbed my nipples. They hardened instantly.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“My. Someone’s been neglecting themselves.” He tweaked my tightened areolas, and I gasped. Masturbation was second hand for me. Nothing compared to sharing a sexual experience with a partner. Especially one as interested in pleasing you as you were them. I always had that with Tall One. He’d chase all my sorrows away with one gentle stroke along my clit.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eMy arms reached behind to run through his hair as he lavished my breasts with attention. I ground my behind into his hardened shaft. His breathy rumble sent shivers down my spine. With one yank, he pulled the top of my dress down to expose my lacy red bra. His petting frantic, the fabric of my undergarments heightened my arousal.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“I can’t hold it, York.” His hips worked into my backside, his desire apparent in the thickened length straining against his clothing.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“I was hoping for a little play tonight.” My words were truth no matter how much my body ached to be rammed into by his cock.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“Trust me.”\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eThe timbre in his voice echoed.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“Always.”\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eHis hands grasped the bottom of my dress and yanked it up past my hips. He groaned when he realized I had gone panty-free for the evening. His palm cracked against my backside, and I yelped.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“You little tease.” Another swat landed on my bare ass. “You’re a bad girl, York.” His hand smoothed over my cheek, cooling the hotness swelling from it before he gave me another punishing whack.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“Hands on the bedpost, young lady.”\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003eWetness pooled down my thighs as I grasped the mahogany and velvet. The golden cord hanging down soon bound my wrists. His searing lips claimed the nape of my neck as his fingers pulled and teased my nipples. One hand ventured down to my wet core, stoking the flame already ignited. I shattered to his demanding touch.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt;\" lang=\"EN-US\"\u003e“Come again.” His gruff voice commanded.\u003c\u002fspan\u003e\u003c\u002fp\u003e\r\n\u003c\u002fdiv\u003e","show_backorder_message":false,"tags":[],"warranty":"","price":{"without_tax":{"formatted":"$4.99","value":4.99,"currency":"USD"},"tax_label":"Tax"},"default_shipping_expectation_prompt":"","detail_messages":"","availability":"","page_title":"","cart_url":"https:\u002f\u002fwww.evernightpublishing.com\u002fcart.php","show_backorder_availability_prompt":false,"max_purchase_quantity":0,"show_quantity_on_hand":false,"show_default_shipping_expectation_prompt":false,"show_quantity_on_backorder":false,"brand":{"name":"Heat Level 4","url":"https:\u002f\u002fwww.evernightpublishing.com\u002fbrands\u002fHeat-Level-4.html"},"attributes":[],"mpn":null,"upc":null,"options":[],"related_products":[{"id":776,"sku":"978-1-77130-665-2","name":"Holly by Kastil Eavenshade","url":"https:\u002f\u002fwww.evernightpublishing.com\u002fholly-by-kastil-eavenshade\u002f","availability":"","rating":4,"brand":{"name":"Heat Level 3"},"category":["Free Reads","Contemporary","Erotic ","Romantasy","Holiday"],"summary":"Santa's Naughty Elves, 1\r\nAfter being dumped last year on Christmas Eve, Chris has tried to forget the girl who broke his heart and made him afraid to commit","image":{"data":"https:\u002f\u002fcdn11.bigcommerce.com\u002fs-21532\u002fimages\u002fstencil\u002f{:size}\u002fproducts\u002f776\u002f928\u002fholly__57702.1386281241.jpg?c=2","alt":"Genre: Erotic Fantasy Romance\n\nHeat Level: 3\n\nWord Count: 10, 010\n\nISBN: 978-1-77130-665-2\n\nEditor: Laurie Temple\n\nCover Artist: Sour Cherry Designs"},"images":[{"data":"https:\u002f\u002fcdn11.bigcommerce.com\u002fs-21532\u002fimages\u002fstencil\u002f{:size}\u002fproducts\u002f776\u002f928\u002fholly__57702.1386281241.jpg?c=2","alt":"Genre: Erotic Fantasy Romance\n\nHeat Level: 3\n\nWord Count: 10, 010\n\nISBN: 978-1-77130-665-2\n\nEditor: Laurie Temple\n\nCover Artist: Sour Cherry Designs"}],"date_added":"5th Dec 2013","pre_order":false,"show_cart_action":false,"has_options":false,"stock_level":null,"low_stock_level":null,"qty_in_cart":0,"custom_fields":null,"num_reviews":1,"weight":{"formatted":"0.00 LBS","value":0},"demo":false,"add_to_wishlist_url":"https:\u002f\u002fwww.evernightpublishing.com\u002fwishlist.php?action=add&product_id=776","price":{"without_tax":{"formatted":"$0.00","value":0,"currency":"USD"},"tax_label":"Tax"}},{"id":424,"sku":"978-1-77130-228-9","name":"Sasha's Gift by Kastil Eavenshade","url":"https:\u002f\u002fwww.evernightpublishing.com\u002fsashas-gift-by-kastil-eavenshade\u002f","availability":"","rating":5,"brand":{"name":"Heat Level 4"},"category":["Contemporary","Erotic ","Gay","Interracial","May\u002fDecember","Multiple Partners"],"summary":"When an old lover shows up out of the blue and gives him a way off the streets, Sasha thinks he's back on track. 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OMG the sex in this book. There were a few mistakes in this book like others have pointed out. I think with a better editor that this writer could be so much more!","date":"26th Feb 2015"},{"name":"LASR","rating":"5","title":"The Long and Short of It Reviews","text":"The Romance Novel Book Club is a gem. Absolutely hilarious, I laughed from page one to the end. Kastil Eavenshade is a romance author but she manages to poke fun at everything that has to do with the genre and does it well. As the book says at one point: “The truth about the romance novels was I did love them. They mocked me in my misery, but I still cheered for that happily ever after.”\r\n \r\nThe author also laughs about life and how confusing and difficult we can make it for ourselves at times.\r\n \r\nHer lead character, Patricia, is great. She eats all she wants, drinks too much and laughs at herself, sometimes even through her tears. She is so human that along with her good moments, her pain, frustration and confusion are palpable. I felt miserable at times watching her crumble and sabotage her own happiness.\r\n \r\nThe biggest fault I found with The Romance Novel Book Club was a mistake in the hero’s height. At the beginning of the book, Patricia says: “I hovered about two inches taller than him without heels”. However, as I read on I found that she was always shorter or at least at the same height as Matt. For instance at one point it reads: “I nuzzled against his shoulder, tempted to kick off my shoes to be at his breast.” She was wearing heels at that moment.\r\n \r\nAnother thing I found confusing was her history with The Black Room and her access to it. I had the impression she went one time without a membership card and another time she had trouble finding it when she’d just been there less than a week before.\r\n \r\nRegardless of these mistakes, Kastil Eavenshade’s novel was a great read. The sex scenes were sizzling hot at all times with well done descriptions that made me gasp and pant. Furthermore, throughout the story I had the sensation that I was reading a contemporary novel in which real people, and not just made up characters, had the lead role.\r\n \r\nThe Romance Novel Book Club was a great book that I know I will be reading again.\r\n","date":"3rd Apr 2013"},{"name":"D","rating":"5","title":"Loved this story!","text":"What a fantastic read! I was drawn in immediately and could not stop reading until the story was complete! ","date":"6th Dec 2012"}]},"bulk_discount_rates":[],"meta_keywords":"","show_quantity_input":0,"title":"The Romance Novel Book Club by Kastil Eavenshade","gift_wrapping_available":false,"min_purchase_quantity":0,"customizations":[],"images":[{"data":"https:\u002f\u002fcdn11.bigcommerce.com\u002fs-21532\u002fimages\u002fstencil\u002f{:size}\u002fproducts\u002f393\u002f509\u002ftrnbc__82234.1353534418.jpg?c=2","alt":"Genre: Erotic Contemporary Romance\n\nHeat Level: 4\n\nWord Count: 44, 350\n\nISBN: 978-1-77130-196-1\n\nEditor: Marie Medina\n\nCover Artist: Sour Cherry Designs"}]}
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